Friday, August 28, 2015

What the Heck Does It Mean to Be Whole?

We hear that expression a lot. I can’t count how many of those feel-good quotes I’ve seen on Pinterest, Facebook, Twitter, and elsewhere that have to do with ‘being who you are,’ ‘claiming your identity,’ and the blessed state of ‘being a whole person.’ These ideas usually revolve around one’s readiness to enter and maintain healthy relationships, or embracing the concept of going it alone.

I think the concept got a foothold in the sixties and seventies with self-help books like I’m Okay, You’re Okay*, and How to Be Your Own Best Friend**. There were others, of course, but those are two that I distinctly recall as a youngster—my mother even provided us with a copy of the latter during adolescence. I wish I had actually understood and applied what I'd read. Nevertheless, as a culture, we’ve been talking about ‘Being Whole’ for decades. 

The reason I’m now contemplating the issue is that when I boiled down the theme of the story I’m working on, the third in my Portraits series, this question—What does it mean to be whole?—keeps coming up.

For anyone who has read Portrait of a Girl Running and Portrait of a Protégé, you know I’ve put my protagonist, Leila, through the mill. Although she has had independence foisted upon her, she is living what appears to be a fulfilling life in a safe and nurturing environment with people who care about her, and with opportunities for personal and artistic growth. Of course, I can’t leave well enough alone. No, I don’t think I’m going to kill anyone off (at least not unless I have to, ha!), but let’s face it—Leila has a lot of unresolved issues about her upbringing, and especially about her mother. She’s been on an emotionally intense roller-coaster ride, but, just because her life seems to have finally leveled out, that does not mean she can side skirt those issues which have left her broken and with pieces missing. Yes, she’s having to confront the question: What the heck does it even mean to be whole?

I Googled the question, and aside from coming up with a lot of religious answers—valid as some may be, I’m not focusing on that route—there are so many opinions, a psychological and spiritual free-for-all! I have my own opinion, but I’m still shaping it. And I am very curious how other thoughtful people define it. Please feel free to leave a comment or send me an e-mail (bridget at jbchicoine dot com) if you’d like to share!

*by Thomas Anthony Harris  **by Bernard Berkowitz, Jean Owen, and Mildred Newman

Tuesday, August 18, 2015

What I Did On My Year-Long Vacation

Well, it’s been…let’s see…over eight months since I last posted! And yeah, I will admit that the break felt good—really good. Not only did I take a break from blogging and nearly all social networking, but I also took an even longer break from writing. I might have been suffering from a bit of burnout, but I think that mostly I wanted to revisit my life the way it was before I took up the crazy notion of publishing my work! Yeah, I actually had a life and it was still intact just waiting for me to slow down, to clear my mind, and to refocus. What do I have to show for it? Well, at least a few pictures… 

Beginning with last autumn...
...we visited New Hampshire...

...did you know they have drug-free cows?...

...we started roasting our own coffee beansyeah, that's a modified popcorn popper!...

...I mooshed my kitties a lot...

...I watched as Todd split a lot of wood...

...we made lots of pear wine (not as good as our last batches)...

...I painted a bit...

...I sewed a bunch of dolly outfits for my granddaughter's American Girl Doll...don't make me rant about how ridiculous those dolls are...

...I tried on goofy hats at the flea market...

...made and ate far too much bread, and didn't spare the brie!...

...visited my beautiful sister and her husband in Virginia...

...enjoyed an 'ice storm' while with friends in the beautiful Virginia countryside...

...came home and survived the rest of our winter in Michigan, and waited until May... 

 ...when we went to the Chesapeake Bay to celebrate our 25th wedding anniversary...

...we watched sunsets...

...and sailed...

...ate raw oysters! Yum!!...

...saw scary sea creatures...

...and gooey ones...

...and ugly ones...

...and more sunsets...

...and hung out on the beach and did nothing at all...

...and sat around some more...

...and played with crab pots...

...and sailed some more...


...watched our last sunset...

 
...and then, a month or so later, we headed to New England and camped with my lovely daughter and her family in Maine...

...and saw more cool jellyfishes...

 ...and visited the Pemaquid Point Lighthouse...

...and took pictures that made me want to write...

 ...and made me want to paint...

...then we backtracked to New Hampshire and kayaked while visiting my brother and his amazing family...

...and ate clams on the halfshell...

...and later on, played on the river with grandbabies...

...and now we are home and I'm writing again. I've had an idea for a third book in my Portraits series, and it has turned into a plot. I'm in the very early stages and can't make any promises, and I won't set any deadlines, but I am making progress and enjoying it.

So, there you have it! I may even post again before the year is out!